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[personal profile] mrlich
We know our friends and family have some questions about our breakup, so we wrote this together to explain some stuff. It will be posted on both of our journals.

The details of our breakup are naturally very personal, but we thought we owed everyone some kind of an explanation. We also wanted to give you ideas on how you can help.



  • First and foremost: We are still friends. This isn't "friends" in the polite, cordial sense; we love each other tremendously and we still dig hanging out together.

  • Nobody did anything wrong. Nobody threw lamps, nobody cheated, nobody kicked the dog, nobody was neglecting the other one, nobody left the milk out, nobody was/is an asshole/crazy. This was a "core differences" issue, and not a reactionary thing.
  • Jill came to this decision mindfully, thoughtfully, and after eons of loving, difficult consideration. This was not hasty. We then both discussed it and this seems like the right course.

  • We are still friends on Facebook and on LJ, we still send each other dorky text messages and links, we still hug a lot. We will continue to help each other out and look out for the other.


  • There is no need for anyone to choose sides, overthink social invitations, or anything like that.
  • There is no need to exclude either of us from an event. Please continue to invite us to whatever you normally would. We both are active members of Philadel and there's no reason for that to change.
  • If there is a social event where we feel it would be odd for us both to attend, we will make that decision between us.


  • If you see one of us at a movie or something with someone else, it is cool. No need to report it back.



Logistics:
We figure you're curious about the living-situation logistics (heh, so are we), so here theyz is:

  • Matt is moving out of the house on Friday. He'll be living at Mark's for a few weeks which gives Matt the opportunity to find the right apartment (versus the fastest apartment) during that time.

  • Jill is going to try to keep the house (assuming a refi makes the payments reasonable). She hopes to not have a roommate, but she will be open to the option down the road depending on how business goes.
  • We're still figuring out who wants the car and what Jill is going to do about health insurance. We're exploring our options.


How you can help:
  • If you have questions (awkward, logistical, or otherwise), please ask one of us, and not each other. :-)


  • The best way you can be a good friend is to not speculate, gossip or choose sides. We will not be dishing dirt, so please don't ask. We will come to you if we need to.


  • You don't have to delete/untag any Facebook photos of us together or anything. We are proud of what we were.





We are 100% committed to zero drama, both for our new relationship and for our relationship with our awesome friends and family. We will keep any awkwardness to ourselves.

We are realistic and we know this will require major holy-crap levels of adjustment for us. We know it is not going to be easy, but we're ready for the challenge.

The overwhelming outpouring of support from all of you has made this much easier for both of us. It does us a lot of good to know that we have such amazing people who want to help see us through this.


So, thanks, troops. We love you, and we really, really appreciate your love, support, and good ju-ju.

Love, Matt and Jill

Date: 2011-01-26 04:50 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lawbabeak.livejournal.com
Poop. Y'all were good people together. You are also good people apart.

Sympathetic hugs and some sort of manly grunt/pound-on-the-back thing.

Date: 2011-01-26 05:06 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] glamour-junkie.livejournal.com
Logistically, if you need anything tangible - a place to put stuff, a cup of coffee shared with a low-stress pal - anything - Scott and I would be happy to help.

We are also here for intangibles. We heart you both. Hugs a lot.

Date: 2011-01-26 03:34 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] grumpymonkey.livejournal.com
What she said. :)

Date: 2011-01-26 06:00 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] spiritualmonkey.livejournal.com
Love to you both from TLM.

Date: 2011-01-26 07:10 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] drjohn.livejournal.com
My sympathies to you both. I hope that last walk together won't be our last.

Call if'n you need an ear; also: bad and/or medical advice.

stuff you already know

Date: 2011-01-26 08:09 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] shellefly.livejournal.com
Saying "if you need anything, Houser and I are here for you" - ride somewhere, person to listen, reality check, night of fun with no drama, unconditional friend love ... whatever - well, you know that already so I am just stating the obvious.

Please feel invited to take us up on this at any time.
Seriously.

Just wrote the same thing in Jill's journal because it is equally true. And hey, if you guys can post the same post, I can comment the same comment.

Also it's 3 am and I am not super witty, but I do love you.

Date: 2011-01-26 06:43 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] boutell.livejournal.com
Aw geez!

Well played though, both of you.

Looking forward to good times with you both.

Sad & Disappointed

Date: 2011-01-26 11:46 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ben lichtenwalner (from livejournal.com)
This must be the most proactive, public and non-dramatic "semi-parting" I've ever seen. Kudos to you both for that - even if I did have to learn about it by reading your livejournal. If you need anything, just call. I still remember your visit to Penn State.

Tell Miss Jill I still expect photos of her in the new hats. This is not an acceptable excuse.

Date: 2011-01-27 03:14 am (UTC)
ext_45721: Rabbit lying on a couch, reading large, antique book of Poe. (*hugs*)
From: [identity profile] caudelac.livejournal.com
Love love and more love, for you both, and you.

(also, if you find yourself NC-ward, stop in for a one-shot game of whatever.)

Date: 2011-02-03 12:59 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] leporidae.livejournal.com
Sorry to hear things didn't work out, but glad you're still friends.

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